Sunday, October 21, 2007

They Used to Grow Them


Another post in less than one week? Must be important.
Not really. Just a couple of occurences that had me curious. Tits. Yep, they're the couple that's got me curious-or I should say, that's got other people curious.

Over the past bunch of years doing comic cons and salons, I've ran into quite a few girls who were convinced that the tits I paint are fake. Huh? I'll repeat-there are females out there who actually think I'm painting women with breast implants. During one San Diego con there were two instances. I had a painting of Girl displayed on my table-nipples covered, of course (don't wanna be banned)-one young couple walked by saw my painting and the girl points at it and says "They're fake." I started laughing and she embarassingly dragged her drooling boyfriend away. A few hours later, another young pair walked by, and this time the young dude stopped dead in his tracks and just ogled the painting for a few seconds before his girly angrily yanked his arm and pulled him away.

More recently, last month to be exact, me and my friend were in a pub hanging out with a girl from England that we met earlier this year. She's cool, but she loves her red wine, if you follow me. I'd never shown her my work before last month because she said early on she never liked comics. Okay-that's cool. Well, she was on her way back to England the following week and after a few bottles of the grape, she asked to see one of my books. I thought, fuck it, show her the hard stuff. I normally show prudes and girls from the U.K. and the U.S. my FANG books just to avoid...what happened next.I showed her "Girl's Kama Sutra" and from the first page it was "Those are fake." Okay, that's it. Number one, it's a goddamned drawing. Number two-why the hell would I draw or paint fake tits? Oh, did I mention she hates men? Always picks the wrong guy and keeps going back to them. I did my best to acknowledge that,okay, she was wasted and kept a reign on my temper. I was used to comments like this, but I guess this night was a little diferent. And I wasn't even drunk-but she was a looker. I just wanted to know why someone would think I draw fake tits. The answer I got that ended the conversation was "Because you're a man."

I truly believe that at some point in history, women grew large breasts. Not all women. But every now and then there are women who have exceptional, natural busoms, and I'm convinced that some of them walk the earth even today. I even remember seeing a few of them in person. But I guess I'm just imagining things. I guess I'll be seeing Elvis next and the Yeti. Now that breast implants are all the rage, I guess women just don't want to grow them anymore-except really fat women. I figured out they're the only type of women whose tits will be accepted as natural. I paint tits because let's face it, they sell books. People think I'm a big boob guy, but personally, I'll take what a girl has. I'm not sure if anyone has noticed, but my paintings don't stop below the tits. I focus on everything because it's my duty.

It's a shame that some women's insecurities have led them to put down other women who've "got more" than they do in an effort to make themselves feel better. "Mine are small, but at least they're real!" So much so that they begin to put down fantasy images. This hapened again last night in a pub. One of the spanish waiters saw a copy of FANG that was left there by the ridiculously gorgeous spanish waitress whom I gave it to who simply loved every page of it. The waiter says to me "I really enjoyed your book with all the colors and the women with all the surgery made tits. Very nice."

And I'm leaving that right there. I don't even have a response to statements like that from a guy. From women, I understand those sad comments. But when a guy says something like that, my audio shuts off and he is off my radar for good.

Maybe next time I'll write about the comments I've heard from the fellas over the years about the dicks I've drawn in my books. Then again, maybe not. I just don't have that kind of time. And you though THIS was a long post.

4 comments:

Josh said...

Oh man, that's funny and sad all at the same time. I remember in high school I had a drawing of a buxom girl in the back of one of my mags, and a girl sitting next to me looked and said:

"They're fake."

I laughed and asked her how she could tell, she said:

"If you can put your arm between her boobs, they're fake," and she was serious as hell about this. Like it was a law of nature.

I never bothered to point out to her that the drawing was a fictional character. That's like saying Santa Claus isn't real because you've never seen him in a picture with the Easter Bunny, huh?

You're right, people have a lot of hang-ups, and women can be the most catty and block-headed when it comes to the way other women look. Big boobs do sell, but I've seen you paint some stunning A-Cup pieces (Applesauce Comes to mind), and last time I checked Jessie is still well within the average range of breast size.

It's too bad to hear dudes making the same kind of comments. That's just incredibly stupid. I don't know, maybe you should just do up a joke page where Jaleira, via the G-Spot show, goes to the doc to prove her mamms are real. It would be ironic and silly, but at least it would end the debate (and give you ample reason to show lots and lots of glorious tit flesh).

Later,

Josh

funbird said...

I've had people say the same thing about my work. I want people to know that the boobs I illustrate are supposed to be real.
I really hate fake boobs btw. Growing up as a teenager in the 80s I saw so many women in mags that had no fake boobs, no piercings, and no tatoos. Women like Roberta Vasquez and Christy Canyon, and Dona Speir. That era is gone unfortunately. But that decade had an influence on my own artwork.

Paolo2000 said...

Well we are living in ridicule times... The "political correctness" obsession is stalking everywhere and some twisted people might see in Taylor's anatomy glorification a legitimation of everything: surgery, anorexy, STDs, racism, etc... you name it...

To me its like old Madame Bovary all over... Boring people

Paolo2000 said...

Well we are living in ridicule times... The "political correctness" obsession is stalking everywhere and some twisted people might see in Taylor's anatomy glorification a legitimation of everything: surgery, anorexy, STDs, racism, etc... you name it...

To me its like old Madame Bovary all over... Boring people